My Testimony

In high school, I had a friend named Clark.  I did not spend a lot of time with him, but I liked him and enjoyed having conversations with him.  

Clark was someone that in high school I would have referred to as a “serious” Christian.  I, on the other hand, was a Christian, having been baptized, but hardly the poster child of someone who called themselves a Christian. 

But I was always curious about the validity of God and that is where Clark came in to play in regards to my faith.  One day, I distinctly remember asking Clark how he knew that there was a God, and his response was, “because I know Him.”   That comment stayed with me because I thought, “Well, you would not say you knew someone, unless you actually did.”   Over the years, I pondered about what Clark meant that he "knew" God.

It would not be until I was married and had my first child, some 15 years after high school, that I finally came to understand what Clark had shared with me about knowing God.  

When I was 30 years old, I remember sitting on my bed one evening and I was crying.  I was so sad because I was just so empty inside.  If anyone had looked at my life, they would have thought I was such a spoiled brat.  By worldly standards, I had it all: a fabulous husband, child, a beautiful home, and a richly blessed life.  I did not work but spent my days playing tennis and often traveling.  Life was filled with all the good you could imagine, but I was empty.  And so I sat on my bed crying and thinking, “Why am I so empty?”

It was as I sat on the side of my bed that night, asking that question, "Why am I so empty?" that all of a sudden a peace and warmth came over my body, a strange sensation where I did not want to move because it was so wonderful; and I heard a voice say, “I am so glad you finally asked, I have been waiting on you.”  It was not an audible voice, but a voice from within me, a voice that I knew was distinct from my own.  After a few minutes of sitting in that warmth, wondering at what I had just heard, that I got up, went in to the bathroom and washed away my tears and my life has never been the same.

It was not like I ran downstairs to tell my husband, “I have been saved!”, because I would not have even said at the time that it was God who had spoken.  It was not as if I had even said the “sinnerʼs prayer”.  But, from that point forward, something dramatic had changed in my life.  I had a hungering desire to know God.  

For the first time in my life, I bought a Bible and started reading it.  I joined a Bible Study and started attending church with Bill (who had always attended church while I slept in on Sunday mornings!).  I started volunteering at church.  My personality changed as I grew in the fruit of the spirit, and the disciplines I learned from Godʼs Word.  I could not be satiated with the things of God; and as I grew, I began to understand more and more what it means to "know" God.

My life, now 20 years later, is completely grounded in my relationship with God. He is my everything, and I mean, everything!  

I do not know why God spoke to me that particular day, and I responded.  I do not know why the light bulb went off then and not some other time.  I do not have a lot of answers that myself and others often ask in regards to God.

But that is o.k., because I have come to believe in Godʼs mystery and magnitude; and I love knowing that I do not have to have all the answers.  I just need to come to Him in faith:  Faith that God is creator of this world, Faith that Jesus is Godʼs son, fully man and fully divine and that He died on the cross to bear our sins, Faith that Godʼs Spirit lives inside me as a baptized Christian, Faith that the Bible is Godʼs Word for us, divinely written and authoritative, Faith that my contentment, completeness, life, and breath come from God, Faith that He can do all things and that I can do all things in Him.

Much has happened in 20 years, but the one constant over all these years, is that I can now agree with Clark that I know God, and I am ever grateful for the seed that he planted in my heart that God brought to fruition so many years later, and hopefully now allows me to plant in the hearts of others as well!  Jesus said, "I have come that they may have life and have it to the full."  When I came to KNOW Him is when I truly came to have LIFE.  This is my desire and my blessing for you, that you may KNOW HIM!

I'll be praying for you if you have questions; and if you already know Him, I will praying that you come to know Him more and more each day!  For a Picture Prayer that I have prayed for you to have TRUE LIFE, click here.

© margaret young